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The problems of living together

The problems of living together

The coexistence It is always where continuity or breakup of a couple is played. Tolerating the existence of others is not something that man brings learned in his genome, but rather the opposite and in the life of every couple there is always a certain overdetermination of family ideology. Not only do we repeat the way we love from our parents, we also show great intolerance against other ways of loving. It often happens that we think of love as an economic transaction, if you give me a kiss, I give you a kiss, when true love would be closer to what it teaches you to love. That is why when we write a letter we always expect the other to answer, without thinking that in that gesture of giving I also received; Thanks to that relationship I found myself writing a letter, which I would never have written if I had no one to send it to. The human being has a hard time getting rid of that first love, which are the parents and more specifically of that mother whose care saved him from certain death. Many couples reflect that first relationship, where dependence is extreme. Getting away from parents, thinking about a life different from what one learned at home is not an easy task.

Problems in living with the couple

We can meet, without explaining very well how, living love relationships where the same situation is always repeated. Thus we see women who always fall in love with men who beat them, men who are always abandoned and cheated by their wives. In the choice of couple there are unconscious desires that the subject does not know. Some couples come together to have a child and when they do, they separate, without anyone around or even themselves being able to understand what is happening to them; there are even those who unite to destroy each other.

The relationship with their families is often a source of serious problems.. Many times the family interference in the life of the couple It is enhanced by the couple who participates in the family of their marital affairs, instead of going to a specialist. The couple's problems cannot be resolved within the family because the affections of each one interfere with the listening of what is happening. The confrontations with the mother-in-law, of which so much is said in the proverb, can occur when the woman wants to also play the role of mother with her husband or the man with the woman and there jealousy arises. The fights with the mother-in-law are still a situation in which two women compete for the same man. Accept that our partner has a father and has a mother allows to agree. It is necessary for one to recognize reality in order to transform it. In a way, denying that one comes from father and mother is a way of denying one's own mortality.

Jealousy, which everyone has felt on occasion, is a normal feeling, which can become pathological and become a feeling of exaggerated possession. Feeling attracted to other men and women who are not the couple, is something that is not always accepted willingly and in that not accepting my own desire, I can project it on my partner, so that I accuse the other of being unfaithful when in reality It is I who wishes to be unfaithful. They are called projected jealousy. To think that at the end of the day a melting pot of feelings and affections is experienced, without the need to do anything about it, releases. The intolerance in front of one's affections it is impossible to observe others with a certain condescension. A couple takes years to build and when the work necessary to keep it alive is not done, they have feelings of inferiority, which translate into a constant fear of losing their partner. In the life of every couple there are always more than two, because they accompany the phrases that one heard from their parents, grandparents, uncles. Separating from parents is always an incomplete task, so if we face our partner to the dilemma of choosing between us or their parents, we are probably surprised that the chosen ones are the parents.