Falling in love is something that often happens suddenly, without us looking for it at that time. Sometimes we ask ourselves if there is a stipulated time to determine if what a person feels is desire, attraction of empty love or if it is a sincere and true love. Today we will try to clarify all these doubts for you.
- 1 Is it love or passion?
- 2 What is love?
- 3 Man and love
Is it love or passion?
Love is a very human feeling, although there are different types of love, since it is not the same love that a mother feels for her child, the love we feel for a pet or the love of a couple.
But sometimes love can be confused with passion, fleeting crush or caprice, according to the love pyramid of Robert J. Strenberg, because thanks to oxytocin, a hormone that is known as “of happiness” or “of love” when stimulated makes us confuse sexual desire with love, when perhaps it is treated just excitement or enthusiasm. Also our own ideas, values, perception or lack of objectivity could lead us to errors.
What is love?
Love is the feeling of affection, respect, trust, protection, sexual attraction, commitment, freedom to be oneself, show and give affection, tolerate, support provided by two people, knowing at least on a solid basis, without either being above the other, as specified by science.
Sexology professionals like Marta Arasanz, Sylvia DeBéjar and even in literary form we can quote Plato in his work of The banquet, talk about the couple, the dyad, as the perfect way for the love relationship to work. Although there are open relationships by mutual agreement that other people frequent sexually, and even experience polyamory, according to anthropologist and biologist Helen Fisher, 2 is still the ideal number of the sexual loving couple, according to studies carried out in continents such as Europe and America, since, simultaneously maintaining different sexual love relationships at the same time, there may not be that balanced love or commitment or bidirectional love that is what characterizes the love of a sexual sexual partner.
Man and love
Studies have been done at the International Academy of Sex Research that indicate that A simple eye contact can be the trigger of love in man. Thus, with a first vision of the other person, of only 8.2 seconds, a man can fall asleep before a woman which you consider beautiful, pleasant, charming or fun.
On the other hand, according to Dr. José Bustamante, he informed the students of Sexology at Fundación U.N.E.D. in one of the key conferences of the year 2011/2012, Sincere mutual love usually appears after 3 years of maintaining a sexual love relationship, whatever the sex, once the passion of the first days has been mitigated. And, if this ends earlier, we can say that it was just a passionate whim, an adventure. When there is a lack of mutuality in both parties, people walk in different directions and do not form a common future.
For a long-term relationship to work, one must fight for it together, since, as A. Beck said, "with love is not enough." It's not always all pink, and you have to work, grow and adapt.
So, How do they show that they are in love with their partner, that they sincerely want and fight to move forward? Well, when they show great respect and complementarity with their partner, they prioritize their positive parts, they try to avoid communication errors such as anger or banal arguments that can harm mutual well-being. They are affectionate (verbally as physically, and not only sexually) they worry about their day-to-day life, talk about the future in the plural, and value their partner in its good and its bad moments.