Sadness is one of the six basic emotions, according to Paul Ekman, along with fear, anger, disgust, happiness and surprise. It is characterized by a mood of suffering, reluctance and dissatisfaction. We often feel sad when our expectations are not met or when the circumstances of life are more painful than joyful.
Sadness puts us in touch with ourselves through loss, separation, or distancing. It may also appear when our expectations are not met.
To be able to live sadness in a healthy way, it is essential to allow ourselves to be sad, and to begin the process of accepting pain, accepting that we can experience and express sadness in order to process it, and be able to move on to another emotion.
“If a person is sad, he must explore the sadness and experience it deeply before he can assimilate and develop it. ”
We usually identify with some precision the event that triggered our sadness, it can be the break with the couple, the loss of a loved one, the appearance of an illness, an unfavorable economic situation and, in general, any situation related to a specific loss or abstract.
Biochemically associated with a low serotonin level
Our body expresses sadness in several ways
We shrink, we can feel a lump in the stomach or throat. Sometimes a pressure in the chest, the eyes begin to fill with tears.
Sadness is a range of states in which psychic pain It is triggered by the connotation that a given situation has for the person. It has different intensities.
Sometimes we may approach others in search of some comfort, to feel less sad, sometimes we close ourselves to try to handle sadness from within. Or on the contrary, sadness comes out as a source that cannot stop, without any containment, as if it were an explosion of crying. Sometimes we repress that sadness, consciously or unconsciously so that it accumulates in the body, until one day we explode without “any reason”
The grief and desolation that are associated with sadness are caused mainly by unique or concurrent factors such as:
- Feeling lacking in love, friendship or appreciation.
- The death or disappearance of a loved one (grief).
- The failure, the frustration.
- The injustice.
- Loneliness, lack of communication, lack of integration.
- The departure, separation or divorce of an esteemed person.
- The suffering and pain from a disease
The sadness, not to confuse with depression
In some cultures, such as the Japanese, the emotion of sadness is contained, is repressed; since showing sadness is an offense towards the surrounding environment.
This shows that emotions exist but their expression and manifestation is different depending on the culture.
Being able to express what we feel helps us feel better. Sadness is an emotion that invites us to reflection, to the recollection of being in contact with ourselves.
When we use the words "sadness" and "depression" as synonyms we are confusing an emotion with a pathology. This confusion brings a negative connotation to the fact of feeling sad. Being sad is uncomfortable and we are willing to do almost anything to get rid of the discomfort that causes us to feel sad and we fall into the error of conceiving sadness as a flu to cure, a cancer to be removed or a demon to exorcise.
Depression is a condition, a disorder that defines a specific symptomatological picture that bursts into daily life as a limitation and an important obstacle in achieving what we consider our plans, objectives or goals. That is, our social, emotional and work life are widely affected. In these cases it is common for sadness to appear apparently "out of nowhere" and without an external event that explains it
The challenge is to recognize the sadness in the body, let it feel, not censor it when I see it, allow its expression, giving physical spaces to share it, talk about what happens to us, and be able to be in the company of the other with this sadness, without trying to avoid it. And finally, let it happen, and not stay locked and hooked on this emotion.
The best way to relieve pain and transmute it is to be lights on the road, lighting and giving warmth at the same time.