- 1 What is libido?
- 2 There are different types of libido
- 3 What makes the difference between male and female libido
- 4 Factors that determine the loss of libido
- 5 How to increase libido?
What is libido?
Libido It is a term that comes from Latin and means wish or drive. It is widely used in the psychoanalysis and defined as a vital energy load linked to sex and influenced by sex hormones, these generate responses in the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system. Freud He defined it as the drive or psychic energy that guides behavior towards an end and is discharged when it is achieved. Although initially linked to sexual energy, it was subsequently defined as an undifferentiated psychic energy (Carl Gustav Jung) that can be related to functions and fields that have nothing to do with sexuality.
There are different types of libido
Many people associate libido with a high sexual desire, that desire that invites you to have wild and spontaneous sex. We have all seen the typical scene of two passionate lovers in film or television. But it is a wrong belief since desire can have other forms. It is what happens in stable couples; At first, you may not feel like sex, but if there is a moment of intimacy with kisses and caresses, the desire that was not a priori can appear. What has just happened is that the form of desire has changed and there is a need for quality rather than quantity in sex. In these circumstances, until the body is not excited the desire does not appear.
What differentiates male libido from female
It is known that there are subtle differences between people of both sexes if we talk about libido.
Female libido is closely linked to the menstrual cycle, depending on the phase of the cycle, the hormones will cause an increase or decrease in it. There are twohormones involved in desire and that women are especially active, these are the estrogen and testosteroneThey are hormones produced by the ovaries and are responsible for hormonal fluctuations and the intensity of female desire throughout the menstrual cycle, causing an increase or decrease in it.
For example, during the preceding days of ovulation, the woman's body registers a peak of estrogen, so the female libido will be at its peak. In men there is also an influence of hormones, but it is more stable over time.
Factors that determine the loss of libido
The first thing we should do is rule out physical or organic problems when determining why the loss of libido occurs.
Organic causes of loss of libido
Sometimes this loss can have the origin in a disease or in the consumption of certain drugs. For example, it is known that the chronic kidney disease can lower desire levels or that Drugs used for depression, anxiety or prostate cancer They can also reduce it. Although most of the time the origin is psychological.
Psychological causes of loss of libido
Among the psychological causes we find the fear of not "giving up" as lovers, the fear of pregnancy or of being infected by a sexually transmitted disease, beliefs or taboos around sex, the education received.
It is also frequent that day-to-day tensions, stress and anxiety They end up affecting our sex life. The communication problems with our partner they are also another factor for our libido to be affected. Another important factor is age, since the older the less libido.
A traumatic sexual experience In childhood or having learned to repress sexual thoughts can also generate a reduced libido.
If the cause has a psychological root, and we want to have a good libido again, psychological therapy is recommended, including cognitive behavioral counseling. Psychological counseling helps to redirect the situation of the couple if the problems are in the relationship. If it is due to stress, the person has to become aware of how this stress is affecting their body and learn techniques to control it.
How to increase libido?
Libido, as we have said, depends on many factors. Making some small changes in the routine can increase and thus live sexuality in a more intense way.
- Spend quality time with the coupleThis time does not necessarily imply having sex, it can be eating together, going for a walk. The idea is to enjoy the company of another person. This will make it easier for you to wake up.
- Talk to your partner about your sexual desires, as you would like intimate encounters to develop, propose to do new things in bed.
- Schedule intimate encounters. Just thinking that we will meet on such a day and in such a place with our partner will make us wake up our libido.
- Not worry about orgasm. Sex are also massages, caresses, hugs and intimacy. Not seeking the purpose of orgasm will make us relax and enjoy the encounter with our partner.
These are just some tips. The important thing is that if you notice that the desire has declined try to find a solution. Having a good sex life is indicative of having good health.