- 1 What is a sexual fantasy?
- 2 So, is it wrong to have erotic fantasies?
- 3 Types of fantasies
- 4 The most frequent fantasies
- 5 Is it good to bring erotic fantasies into practice?
What is a sexual fantasy?
The sexual fantasies are Mental representations of sexual themes. They can occur voluntarily or involuntarily by our mind and they are quite common, although most people keep them for privacy.
They usually appear at puberty and accompany the human being for the rest of his life. It has been proven that both men and women fantasize with the same frequency but their fantasies are different and men tend to explain them with less modesty than women. Fantasies do not depend on age or sex.
Have fantasies it's something completely natural and healthy from the psychic point of view since they serve to disconnect the mind from everyday problems, it is an escape route that leads us to evasion. In addition, they have an aphrodisiac power that can increase sexual desire and arousal. In fact, it seems that having few fantasies or lack of them could be an indicator of Hypoactive Sexual Desire or suffer a stress picture.
So is it wrong to have erotic fantasies?
For this type of fantasies to be considered as pathological, they should affect the life of the individual and be their only way of having sexual pleasure. In this case we would talk about paraphilias, in which fantasy becomes an obsessive act, whose purpose is not sexual gratification but to carry out the situation generated by the person's obsession.
Sexual fantasies help improve one's pleasure, since they stimulate libido, so it is healthy to have fantasies and we should not feel guilty for having them.
Types of fantasies
You can define two types of fantasies, the calls “creative ” which aim to enrich the sexual relationship and arouse desire and “yearned for ”, these refer to what you would like to happen. Almost all, both of one type and the other, report pleasant sensations, although sometimes there are people who may have fantasies that are disturbing to them such as dreaming of a rape, if the fantasy is recurring and causes the person discomfort, it should be investigated the origin since there could be some trauma or unconscious fear in the person.
The most frequent fantasies
Male sexual fantasies
- Make a threesome. Perhaps the most popular male sexual fantasy. Many fantasize about having two women in bed at the same time, the ménage à trois It always occupies the top positions when it comes to fantasizing.
- Role play. Pretending that your partner is another person is also a male imaginary classic. There is the classic nurse or horny girl, but the police also succeed, better if they accompany a good set of wives.
- Voyeurism. Being an observer of your partner's masturbation is also something that excites men a lot, especially if the other person doesn't realize it. Contemplating naked people or having sexual encounters can lead to the fantasy of having sex with another person while watching your partner or someone watching them while making love.
- Sex in publicMany men find the risk of being caught during sexual intercourse exciting; in the bathrooms of a disco, on a beach with people.
Female sexual fantasies
- Submission. The woman wants to receive orders or even experience pleasure through physical pain. In general, women who like this kind of games tend to be real-life controllers and get excited thinking that for once we don't have the power.
- Rape. Although it is a very thorny issue, this is a fantasy that occurs and at the same time is very unreliable. It has a lot to do with the fantasy of submission. It is necessary to take into account this fantasy is far and has absolutely nothing to do with a desire to be attacked, it is simply exciting for the woman to think that she is able to drive the man crazy to the point of making him lose control.
- Lesbian fantasies (heterosexual women). It is one of the most common fantasies and does not mean being bisexual, it is simply because of the curiosity that arouses.
- Sex with strangers or celebrities. The fantasy is to have a fleeting, unexpected and uncompromising encounter with the other person.
- Be dominatrix. In this case, the woman is excited to think that she has control over the man, inflicting humiliations and being the only recipient of pleasure.
- The exhibitionist. It is to wish to be seen while having sex, either by strangers in situ or being recorded.
- The vouyerist. Watching from a hidden place as others have relationships is also a very recurring fantasy, as well as imagining participating in sexual acts while other people observe.
Is it good to bring erotic fantasies into practice?
It depends on the type of fantasy. According to experts, some fantasies are better to stay in the imagination and carry them out It could compromise the physical integrity of the participants and are classified as crimes, for example, having sex in public. Other fantasies, which can be put into practice since they can help stimulate sex life and overcome some inhibitions.
The best thing is that it is the same person who decides if it is better for them to stay in the fantasy world or want to try it in real life. But If the person is in a sexual relationship in which their sexual tastes are in the same line as those of their partner, there is no reason not to share the fantasies more intimate. Anyway you always have to assess whether fantasy can disturb the other. In a relationship, not everything has to be shared.